"He is no fool who gives up what he cannot keep to gain that which he cannot lose." ~Jim Elliot

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Sunday, October 13, 2013

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Romans 8:23
And not only this, but also we ourselves, having the first fruits of the Spirit, even we ourselves groan within ourselves, waiting eagerly for our adoption as sons, the redemption of our body.

"If I find in myself desires which nothing in this world can satisfy, the most logical explanation is that I was made for another world." ~C.S. Lewis


This blog was born out of the realization that though there is much change in life and though I am bound to changing circumstances and locations, this world is not my home. Right now I'm away from home. Understand this please. I'm in my house on Poinsettia Drive. And I'm in the house of an earthly body. But I am not home.

This summer and fall has thrown me many curve balls. New location, new job, new church, new friends, (soon) new school - new life. And it has terrified me. For the first time in my life, I have come to the realization that I am deeply afraid of many things. And for yet another time in my life, I am awake to the paralyzing pain in our world today.

It's not just angry customers that scare me. It's not just uncertainty. It's not just transferring. It's not just a shooting in Washington. It's the weight of it all. When all of these ingredients are mixed into a drink, the cup becomes utterly bitter, almost impossible to swallow.

This is my burden. This is my mountain. These are my tears. This is my present death. It's my groaning.

There are some days I do not know what to do. All I can do is cry out to God for His grace and fall at the mercy of Christ. And it is on days like these that I come to the end of all hope in this world, and here I see that I was not made for this world at all. I was made for - and in sorrow and expectation I yearn for - a different world, a heavenly city, a place prepared, a weight of glory.

And that place is home.

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