Two thousand years ago a beloved Son sweat and bled for my transgressions. He died, in the anguish of His soul, an orphan. In his darkest hour, He lifted His face to His Father, crying out the name of His God. There was no answer. Not this day. He, the Son of Heaven, was now the sin of the world. Blood and water flowed from His side, and from His very wounds He washes clean all who call upon His name.
Written on a night last year I cannot remember:
O God, You see the stroke of every letter - only You know every word. When I am not moving, even then - You are. Your greatness depends not on my devotion. Your sovereignty rests not on my obedience. Your faithfulness yields not to my emotion.
My Lord, You behold the aching, the void of my heart. You are my true love. When my cares are many, You hold my burden; in my greatest temptation, You become my deepest remedy. Your love pierces my heart like a blade, and with Your beauty You draw me into Your presence.
Fill the void, my God. Mend me. Amend the evil that I have so long committed, and replace it with thoughts of You. O Father, forgive my sins. My Lord, make me pure and holy within - You alone can rescue. You alone will do.
So often am I distracted by the cares and the toys of this world. I give up my heavenly gold for what is only dirt. Behold, my greatest water lies before me and I wander aimlessly through barren deserts. My mind is consumed with "I am not" when you are calling out to me, "I AM."
Take me in to the fellowship of Christ. Remove the loneliness in my single soul, and replace it with the oneness in Jesus I have with my brothers and sisters. Dissolve the poison of my pride. Eradicate the sin. Satisfy me in the sanctifying rain of You. Only You can fill me. Baptize me in Your Scriptures.
Be my love.